Hats Off To These Ladies
Two friends create a mini-empire where Chicago women can celebrate aging with smiles, laughter and the bonds of friendship
By Paige Greenfield
Terri Starodub and Karen Kos have been best friends since fourth grade. At 50, the women seem more like sisters. Sweeping side-by-side down the 4500 block of Clark Street with the same stride and same smiles, there’s hardly a moment for breath amidst their laughter and chatter. Even on a bleak January afternoon, the women emit a warmth that makes you feel like you’ve been their best friend for more than four decades, too.
Maybe these women glow because they are royalty. Starodub, a church administrative assistant, and Kos, an accounts payable manager, are the monarchs and founders of Purple Passion Majesties, a Chicago chapter of the Red Hat Society, which is a movement changing perceptions about aging women.
Whenever Red Hatters are in a group of two or more members, they don the official attire of red hats and purple clothes. “Passion Queen” Starodub, a self-described “large woman” is cocooned in a purple cape capped off with a wide-brimmed red hat and a red rhinestone bracelet dangling across her left wrist. “Vice Mum” Kos’ more modest purple shawl is offset by her red cowboy hat with a purple piped rim and large purple flower in the center. In case their apparel and laughter are not bright enough to notice the ladies bounding from store to store searching to expand their Red Hat wardrobes, the jingling bells on Kos’ shoes are sure to alert you that they have arrived.
On April 24, Purple Passion members will join Red Hatters across the U.S. to clink their tea cups, toasting to top the record set in the Guinness Book of World Records for the world’s largest tea party. The competition: 7,000 participants on a Singapore farm in 2001. Chicago’s Drake hotel will become a field of spring flowers when 1,150 purple-cloaked, red-capped ladies from chapters throughout Illinois sip their tea together. Even if they don’t surpass the record, it will be the biggest tea party in Red Hat Society history.
According to 60-year-old founder and “Exalted Queen Mother” Sue Ellen Cooper on the group’s official website, redhatsociety.com, “the Red Hat Society began as a result of a few women deciding to greet middle age with verve, humor and élan. We believe silliness is the comedy relief of life and, since we are all in it together, we might as well join red-gloved hands and go for the gusto together.”
“There’s something about wearing the hat,” says Kos. “I just get happier. I know I’m going to have a good time. It’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
Since the Red Hat Society’s birth in 1997, it has swelled to 900,000 members worldwide with more than 37,000 chapters throughout the U.S. and in more than 25 countries. Chicago alone boasts more than 100 chapters, making purple-cloaked, red-capped ladies increasingly conspicuous throughout Chicago-land.
When the Red Hat Society held its first convention in Chicago in April 2002, Starodub’s husband cut out an article in a local newspaper about the Society. Starodub and her four closest pals leapt onto the Red Hat bandwagon. Instead of joining a local chapter, the ladies began their own, figuring they were five friends already doing Red Hat things. Purple Passion Majesties sealed it with a name, an outfit and new friends. Two and a half years and more than 50 members later, Purple Passion Majesties are one of the most active chapters in the region, with monthly “gatherings” to plays, dance lessons, Spirit of Chicago cruises, dinners, poker lessons and many other activities including the upcoming tea at the Drake.
“We get noticed,” says Kos. “It defies the trend of women being ignored. We’re still vibrant. We’re still around.”
As “Passion Queen” and “Vice-Mum,” Starodub and Kos fill most of the group’s administrative hats – of course all of them red – to keep the Purple Passion Majesties busy. They plan the monthly “gatherings,” collect dues for events and lead impromptu shopping expeditions in Andersonville for new Red Hat attire. On this particular outing, Starodub is hunting for a purple hat to wear in April, her birthday month, when Red Hat rituals call for members to reverse their colors to red clothes and purple hats.
Yes, the Red Hat Society has rules.
Want to join the fun, but not quite a half-centurion yet? Meet the Pink Hatters. There’s no need to wait until the big 5-0, women eager to participate in the Red Hat Society can play alongside their elders too. But it’s lavender clothing and pink hats until their “Reduation” on their fiftieth when Pink Hatters trade their garb for the official ruby red and purple. In fact, Starodub and Kos were so enthralled with the Red Hat Society that when they created the Passion Majesties two and a half years ago, at 48, they couldn’t even wear the official colors.
When Red Hatters from across the state invade the Drake next month, Starodub and Kos know they are guaranteed a great time. “Wherever we go, we just bring smiles to people’s faces,” says Starodub. And with the women’s strike of wit, humor and camaraderie, that’s what the Red Hat Society is all about.
